Harmonies of Noise

the sorrow jaded our faces, like we were addicted to grieving,
waltzing with worry, in case, we span so many times we would wind a web,
to keep us close, close.
so close, a fingertip on your lip
or a eyelash on your wrist made you tremble,
his sour words claimed so many untruths I become intoxicated, rummaging through the crevices of my nature, searching frantically for hope..
but he has a appetite for impatience, and I, an appetite for affection, and its carnage, a duel on quicksand, inhaling us in like a breath..
time had no rest,
he wanted to do the honours.. I just wanted to honour him,
deprived of tradition yet walked under its cycle like a halo,
carrying its flag above my head, tearing through the chants of expectations..
as it painted a spectacular constellation.
I catered to you, you catered to you, energy biting into your senses as it sapped my rapture.
My intentions were tarnished so I performed my ablutions,
precisely and with caution, using my tears,
but it led nowhere.
a foreign ground.
where if I tiptoed like a fairies dainty dance or stomped like a elephant trying to remember,
you reminded me I was not brilliant, nor ignored, nor heard, but absent.
I resolved to seek commotion. Noise. Torment and disorder with wistful listens of harmonies, but convinced myself that turbulence was a rebellion
after all, who is not drawn to rebels?